Thursday, March 3, 2011

code name mama's: march of kindness

I have been reading alot about Dionna @codename mama and her March of kindness on facebook. It hit me that this was an excellent idea and I really wanted to participate, but then "the word" appeared. "The word" being COMMIT! Time and time again, I would see that word. Commit to participate in Code Name Mama's March of kindness. Commit to show a random act of kindness every day in March. Will you join us in our commitment to............well, you get the idea. Let's just say, that if we were all in a room, chairs in semi-circular formation, I would stand-up and say "my name is Jodi, and I'm a commitment-phobe".
The funny thing is, I'm not a commitment-phobe when it comes to the really big things. Marriage, check! Buy a house, check! Help raise step-son, check! Have kids, check, check, checkity, check! I'm a commitment-phobe in relation to the proverbial "small stuff". I don't "sweat" it, I just avoid committing to it. While berating myself for the past few days, and wishing that I could just commit to this quest, I had a thought. By committing to this endevear, I would be doing myself a random act of kindness. By pushing through the uncomfortable, I would be making myself a better person. There is no better act of kindness.
As I type, I am thinking of the sample acts of kindness that Dionna has listed on her website . there were so many simple ideas that can be done. Acts of kindness that should be done everyday, even if there was no 'challenge' to do so. You can spend 5 extra minutes with your child, minutes that would normally be spent on the phone or doing some other task that takes up most of our adult life. You can do something nice for a friend our your partner. Write a quick note of appreciation to someone who has been kind to you. Write a note of encouragement to someone who needs it. There are hundreds of things that could be done to make the world a kinder place.
There are a few things that I have done today that were purposeful acts of kindness, even though i was, at the time, NOT going to commit to anything!! For example, Today, when my BFF asked me to *gulp* commit to watching her daughter, my beautiful neice, I said "yes". I have no issue watching her, I just have a hard time saying "yes" without resistance. I defended a mom at work today even though I have never met her, even though she was not even present, when her son's therapist was talking about her parenting. I stopped myself from yelling at Pip when she continuously interrupted my conversation with hubz. And my greatest act of kindness occurred at a sesame street live performance. During intermission, hubz, pip, peanut and myself were taking a stroll. I was wearing peanut in my moby and we passed a similar aged toddler on a leash. I ignored this, although I had much to say. THEN, as I was recovering from the sight of it, two men of a less than clean, less than smart nature, were heard by hubz saying 'you thought the leash was bad, check that thing out' to each other. Once we were past them and hubz relayed what he had overheard, I decided to do another act of kindness. I decided to NOT punch them in the face. I decided to turn around and give them some information. I asked the men if they thought my baby wrap was as bad as a leash, to which they replied, um oh um. I didn't let them lie, I just gave them some information. One of the men was holding his toddler who was thrashing around in his arms. I pointed out that he would benefit from a carrier. And then I told him what I thought. Leashes promote wild, non-hand-holding behavior. It tells your child that you want them far away from you. A carrier tells my child 'i want you close because I love you'. Wearing my baby is also an act of kindness.
So, Dionna, I will try. I will try to commit to the March of kindness. I will try to do a random act of kindness, every day even though i am still more worried about the 'committment' than i am worried about the 'kindness'!


  1. Last month I tried to commit to a month of exercise, and I failed miserably. I'm pretty commitment phobic myself too, simply because I beat myself up when I don't "succeed." But hey - even if we miss a day (or two or three or or or) this month, we're still ahead of the game by all of the other random acts of kindness! I'm glad you're joining us!

  2. I"m pretty much the same way. Baby (lifelong commitment there!) check. Committed, mutually-beneficial loving relationship, check. Trying to write a blog post every day or every other day? Meh. Vacuum? Meh.

    If it's small, I try to negotiate, lol.

    But I like this random act of kindness!

  3. I LOVE it that you stopped and passed along information. And full credit for not punching anyone in the face!
    There's no telling what those gentlemen will retain of what you shared, but you may have done a lifetimes worth of kindness to their children if they "got" even a bit of it.

  4. Every day that you do a kind act that you wouldn't have done if not for the March of Kindness is a day with a little more sunshine, a little more happiness, and a little more light in the world.
    Don't be hard on yourself. Life is what it is, and if we can make it a little better for one another, awesome.
    By the way, I've never been to your blog before but when I saw the header photo load my first thought was "what a beautiful bunch of kids!"

  5. I am the same way <3 Really good and commiting to the big stuff, the small stuff not so much. I was also hesitant to participate and thats exactly why I said I was not going to commit to typing a certain ammt of blogs about it. Everytime I commit to do anything on my blog I end up forgetting, Curse this mommy brain!

  6. Hi from another commitaphobe!!

  7. Oh, yes. Right on the nose. What you resist, persists. I tried to give up Starbucks and it was the only thing I could see (I know, I know, not to hard with one on every corner in Cali) So, I took out the "commitment" part and changed it up to be what is healthiest for my body. Much better!

    I look forward to reading your experiences this MOK!